Leavetakings
by LauraS7
Summary: Remember you are a Black. Sirius grew to hate those five words and eventually left. What did his family do that was so terrible? What went on behind the closed doors of one of wizarding Britains most ancient and notorious families?
1. Chapter 1

_Disclaimer: Nothing you recognise belongs to me. I just like to have some fun with it. JK Rowling owns all._

_Author's note: Sorry to anyone who has started reading my other story that another chapter still isn't forthcoming. Trying to finish a degree, write a dissertation and find a job all at the same time are taking thier toll. However i found myself inspired to write and sadly didn't have my notes with me for 'Changed my mind'. It will continue i assure you, but in the meantime i hope you enjoy this. I don't have anyone willing to beta read for me at the moment so all mistakes are my own. If you find them let me know and i will fix them._

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**Chapter 1**

Sirius sat in his room idly flicking through a book. It was the first half term of the school year and instead of having the run of the school with his friends James, Peter and Remus he was stuck in 12 Grimmauld Place for an entire week. Normally his parents allowed him to stay at school during most of the holidays, or rather they insisted he stayed at school, but this time had been different. His mother and father were throwing a serious of scoial events over the course of the week, and it had been decided that as the heir he should be attending. Teh rest of the week he intended to spend mainly in his room, reading and even, musch to Remus' shock and amazement, doing his homework. His musings were interupted by a small squat figure appearing in the doorway.

"Mistress says Young Master must come down now."

At the sound of the house elf's voice Sirius jumped. He quickly stuffed the book he had been reading underneath the edge of his duvet. Remus had lent him some muggle books to read over the holidays as a break from the inevitable pureblood mania and he was sure his father would not approve.

"Thank you Kreacher" replied Sirius, not really meaning it. He picked at some of the fine silver embroidery on his robes, anxious to find some kind of defect that would delay his arrival at the party he knew had already begun downstairs.

"You can go Kreacher, tell mother I will be down in a minute," he muttered and sighed again.

"Kreacher must stay till the young master comes says my mistress."

"Get out of my room." Sirius commanded in his best 'scion of the House of Black tones'

Kreacher seemed torn between staying to further berate the young man he had been sent to fetch and following his instincts to obey those sharp clipped words that Sirius has seen his father use so effectively.

"One day I'll be master of this house and you will have no choice. If I order you right out of the door you'll have no choice," he watched as the miserable house elf edged out of the room, though by the sounds of the footsteps he had only moved as far as the corridor.

With another sigh he headed into the bathroom for a last check of his appearance. It wasn't worth the hassle he would get from his Mother if he turned up downstairs not looking the image of a Black. Whatever that was supposed to be. Hair neatly slicked back, robes in good order the fine fabric held together by a silver clasp in the shape of two snakes twisting around each other, shoes polished and nails clean. It would have to do. Of course the real things that were wrong with him could not be fixed by fine clothes, however Slytherin they might be. His house allegiance, recklessness and choice of friends bothered his family far more than his outward appearance but were things that Sirius was not willing and not able to change.

Tucking his wand into the inside of his robes, he headed off down the corridor, ignoring Kreacher who submissively followed behind now that Sirius was doing what had been asked of him. As he passed he risked a quick glance into Regulus' room, but his younger brother was not there. Of course he wouldn't be late for the party, not perfect Regulus.

As he descended the final stairway he caught sight of his mother waiting in the entrance hall below. Gesturing imperiously she motioned him off to one side.

Before Sirius had a chance to speak she began her litany of terms for this evening's social function. "You are 16, nearly of age, it is time we started to consider your future beyond Hogwarts. There are some people at this gathering tonight who may be very important to that future. You will behave. You will keep your nasty blood traitor Gryffindor views to yourself. You will purport yourself as is becoming to a Black. Or there will be consequences. Go and stand by the door to greet our guests"

Before Sirius had time to snap out a reply his cousin Narcissa glided into the entrance hall.

Mrs Black bustled off in a cloud of exclamations "Narcissa darling, I've heard about your engagement, you must give me all the details…"

As they passed into the main dining room Sirius could no longer hear her rapturous tones. It didn't matter anyway. Narcissa's engagement to the highly eligible Lucius Malfoy had been all that the family had spoken about for the entirety of the holidays. What a _perfect _match, such good bloodlines, how _elegant _they were together. Frankly Sirius had had enough. He knew Narcissa couldn't stand Lucius, or at least couldn't stand any part of him except his money. That she would spend quite happily, and was probably the thought that was keeping the smile on her face through those long discussions of how lucky she was and how happy they would be together.

Still mulling over his mothers cryptic remarks about 'his future' and 'people who may be important' he headed into the more populated parts of the house. The reception room was looking stunning as ever. Enchanted candles floated about in ornate gold and silver candle holders, a troupe of house elves carried silver plates loaded with goblets of fine wines and champagne. Everything was perfectly arranged to give out a very simple message. We are the Blacks; we are better than you, look what we can afford. There were only a few people drifting about the room as yet, perhaps he was not as late as he thought. Grimacing he noticed that Narcissa's intended, Lucius Malfoy, was already there. He doubtless considered himself virtually part of the family now. The elder Malfoy's were not yet in attendance, likely they would make their own entrance later on in the evening, when they were certain of appearing to a full house. Family came first, less important guests would be arriving after that, with those held most highly by society arriving anything up to two hours late. Still that suited Sirius fine. In his experience the higher in society someone was held to be the less he liked them.

Just then the door chime sounded and he hurried over to greet the guests as he had been instructed. Sirius' heart dropped as he opened the door. In the doorway stood a tall sallow man who had a slightly hunched look about him, however it was not this man that had provoked such a reaction from Sirius. Standing behind the tall man, looking pale and ethereal in his shadow was his son.

"Black," came the barely cordial greeting from Severus Snape.

"Better not call me that here Severus," he said offering a quick glace to Snape's father and the other adults around, "it might get a little confusing."

"As you wish _Sirius._" He replied. He made Sirius' last name sound less like a greeting and an acquiescence to civility and more like a mortal insult, and as he and his father walked into the main room, Sirius couldn't resist slyly hitting him with a pimple curse. Hopefully he wouldn't notice until someone pointed it out.

A string of other minor guests turned up as Sirius continued his vigil at the door. He had no hope that any of his friends might turn up. This was not a major social event, the guests were people that the Black's genuinely liked, as well as a few hangers on. Nearly everyone Sirius had seen so far had been mentioned in conversations by his father that connected them to this new self styled Dark Lord that everyone was getting so uptight about. For the third time of the evening so far he let out a sign. This gathering had every appearance of one of politics and Sirius knew that that could only bring trouble.

Half an hour later Regulus turned up to take his place.

"Mother wants you in the drawing room." He commanded.

"What for?" Sirius asked. He had got comfortable in his spot by the door, he hadn't needed to make any real conversation and aside from that one small confrontation with Snape he had avoided any temptation to get himself in trouble. All in all he reckoned he was safer where he was.

"How should I know?" retorted Regulus. "Go and find out. It's not like I had anything better to do." He sounded decidedly bitter and Sirius remembered that he has seen Melissa Nott arrive with her mother father and brother recently and that rumour named Melissa and Regulus as a couple since the beginning of the school year. Sirius and Regulus' parents had been thrilled. Melissa was a good pure-blooded girl and her parents held the 'right' ideas. Sirius had his suspicions that his parents and her parents were considering a betrothal contract. Regulus has most likely been 'entertaining' Melissa somewhere quietly before the party started and had not welcomed the interruption his mother had made.

With the welcoming thought that he had at least caused a little trouble for someone that annoyed him he headed off, once again, to attend his mother.

When he reached her she was surrounded by a gaggle of women. He edged up slowly, unsure as to whether he should interrupt. While he was still skulking round the egde of the seemingly impenetrable group, scuffing his feet as he waited for a gap to appear, he felt a sharp pain against the back of his legs. With a quiet hiss of pain he turned round to come face to face with his father holding his wand loosely in one hand giving Sirius a Look. The room was becoming more crowded, so instead of a loud lecture on his mainly faults and failings, Sirius was merely treated to a hurried criticism of his behaviour.

"Black's do not sniff round the edges of groups like an animal. Head up. Back Straight. I see your time in Gryffindor has done your bearing no favours at all. Perhaps you would care to spend some time practising this holiday." His father enunciated.

"Yes Sir" Sirius replied, his tone of voice tight with rage as he saw that Snape had observed the entire exchange and was quietly sniggering while his father was engaged in conversation.

To drive his point home Orion Black flicked his wand lazily again and Sirius felt another bite of pain across his back. He turned around, keeping his head up, and moved purposefully forward to address his mother.

"You asked to see me mother?" said Sirius.

"Some time ago yes," She also gave him a look that held the promise of a later punishment for his tardiness, "Elladora Rosier is admiring the Winter Rose Garden. Go and introduce yourself, make her feel welcome."

Sirius shot her a confused look, the message he had received from Regulus had sounded as though his mother had something important to tell him, and here she was asking his to greet another guest.

"But mother…" he started.

The look she gave him superseded any possible words she could have used. The cold glare was fixed upon him and, feeling slightly like a leaf that had been picked up by the wind, buffeted about, not knowing where he was going to end up next, he set off to the rose garden.

On arriving in the garden he saw, as promised, a young woman he recognised from Hogwarts. He thought she was a year or so below him and in Slytherin. It wasn't surprising he didn't know much more about her, he tried to have as little to do with that house as possible. As he came round in front of her he put on him most congenial smile. Her look however was far more calculating.

"Sirius Black," she started, "a trouble maker, a Gryffindor, reckless, always in detention, but on the plus side, heir to one of the oldest richest families, and not hideous to look at."

Sirius was momentarily nonplussed by this reeling off of his personal qualities.

"Yes?" he put forward "You must be Miss Rosier." As expected she held out her hand and he kissed it, somewhat awkwardly. "I'm afraid I don't know anything about you." He added.

"Really?" she asked incredulously "I mean I know there's nothing we can do about it, but I'd have at least thought you'd want to know a little about me."

Sirius was becoming more and more confused. He felt like there had been an entire conversation that he had just missed.

"What? Why?" he stuttered, trying to keep up.

"Well our parents are in there discussing terms for our betrothal contract." She said in a resigned tone.

"What?! No. I mean.. What? Not that you're.. but.. Hang on." He stuttered and dashed off again leaving Elladora sitting alone in the rose garden once more.

Sirius burst back into the house, knocking over several house elves as he went. Most of the guests turned round to face him as glasses of expensive champagne went flying everywhere. He ran over to his moher who was still deep in conversation with Mr and Mrs Rosier.

"What are you doing? I'm not getting married! Not to some girl I've never even met." he yelled.

His mother looked shocked, Mr and Mrs Rosier gave him an appraising yet disdainful look.

"We will have this conversation later Sirius. In private." His mother looked serious, but Sirius was too worked up to stop and think, his hair was disarrayed and there was a mad glint in his eye.

"You can't just decide what to do with my life like I'm some kind of pet! Ordering me around. I'll do what I want!" He ranted.

Once again his mother started in those tight clipped tones, trying to ignore the fact that every eye was now turned to her wayward son. "You. Are. A. Black. You will do what is right for the family and for our bloodline. Toujours Pur. It has been decided."

"I don't care about this stupid family, or your stupid ideas about blood! If this is what being pure-blooded is about then I don't want any part of it! Andromeda had it right marrying a muggle to escape you all. I wish I could do the same! Gasping, Sirius took breath to continue his rant when he saw his mother's gaze flicker over his left shoulder. Behind him once more was the imposing figure of his father, and this time his rage was barely under control. His face was deep scarlet, his hands clenched tightly, his lips pursed, so as, Sirius assumed, not to let out the torrent of curses that were sure to be thrown at Sirius later. Sirius' stomach turned to ice as his father approached. Though he was 16 and no longer had the lithe slim figure he had had as a child his father, was still broader and taller and towered over him like a tidal wave. He was not afraid of his father, and if he kept repeating that to himself it might become true. He drew comfort from the fact that he wouldn't do anything here. He wouldn't cause a scene. That would be very unblack-like.

"Upstairs. Now" his father commanded in a voice as cold as steel.

Sirius looked at him with wide eyes, the colour drained from his face and without another word he turned and strode out of the room. Carrying himself, although he did not know it, with all the dignity that he had been punished for lacking earlier.

Orion Black turned towards a house elf, "Kreacher, see that he does not leave his room."

"Yes Master," and he hurried off after Sirius.

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_Please review! If you are a writer you know how much it means and if you are not you can't imagine how happy it makes us!_


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

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Sirius paced around his room, looking for something to smash, or perhaps somewhere to hide. Kreacher had closed and locked the door when he had delivered Sirius to his room. He could hear him now, rocking back and forwards, waiting just outside the door. He paused by the fireplace as the figure in the portrait above gave a quite cough. Phineas Nigellus stared down haughtily from his portrait over the richly appointed fireplace.

"What trouble have you got yourself into now boy? The shame of it." He drawled.

Sirius did not reply, but continued his anxious pacing around the room like a tiger trapped in a cage. Fire place, dressing table, bed, wardrobe, fireplace dressing table, bed, wardrobe, fireplace… if only he had some flue powder… dressing table, bed… under his bed all of his Gryffindor things were hidden, his mother had a habit of 'accidentally' throwing them away when she saw them, but nothing was there that would help him get away… wardrobe…his broom! It should still be in the wardrobe. London wasn't the ideal place for Quidditch practice so it normally got stored there until he had the opportunity to visit James or family out in the countryside. He wrenched open the door to find his wardrobe full of robes of the finest silk, robes with thread of gold and silver worked into intricate patterns, fine cotton under garments, stiff shirts made of the highest quality Egyptian linen, but no broom. Sirius closed his eyes and cursed quietly as he remembered it was stashed in one of the outhouses bordering the central courtyard. He had been messing around with Uncle Alphard when he had come over earlier in the holiday.

Just as he was contemplating smashing a window Phineas chose to comment once more.

"For goodness sake boy. Pull yourself together. You are a Black."

"Well I wish I wasn't," Sirius muttered sotto voce.

"Very well then," Phineas countered, "I thought you were a Gryffindor? Are you not supposed to be brave?"

Phineas' tone was perfectly calculated to be both mocking and condescending, and worked perfectly. Sirius drew himself up and turned to face the door to await whatever his father decided to do.

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Orion Black took his time before leaving to attend to his eldest son. He circulated around the room, making polite conversation with those he was familiar with. Social events were more the domain of his wife; however with Sirius on the cusp of adulthood it was vital that the world saw the Black family as united, powerful and above all desirable for a marriage match. It was his greatest desire to see Sirius make a good match, produce strong healthy sons to continue the family line and maintain the family reputation that had taken generations to establish. He revelled in the fact that there were few members of the wizarding world who were as skilled and powerful as he, had as many good connections and could claim better linage, and he wished Sirius to understand this feeling. When Orion Black walked into a room people took notice, when he wanted something done, it was done or consequences were suffered.

He was snapped out of his musings by a tap on the shoulder and a cheerful greeting emanating from Horace Slughorn. Inwardly Orion Black shuddered, the man was repulsive and creeping, but he was connected and a wrong word could cause far reaching ripples of gossip. Outwardly however he gave no indication of his dislike, fixing his face in a polite but haughty smile and returned the greeting.

"Orion," Slughorn continued in his nauseatingly cheerful tone, "I've always said the Black's throw the best parties, and this is no exception, even for such a small soiree the buffet is exceptional and the guests perfectly chosen."

"Thank you," replied Orion graciously.

Slughorn gazed thoughtfully into his glass of wine, swirling it slightly, as though to fully admire the scent of the fine vintage. Apparently satisfied he looked back up at and gave Orion what could have been construed, had Orion not known the man to be a complete buffoon, as a coolly calculating look.

"Had some difficulties with young Sirius earlier I hear?" Slughorn suggested in a less jovial but still nauseating measure of voice.

Orion gave him a measured glance, while privately wondering at the speed at which gossip could travel. If Slughorn knew it was fairly certain that most of the guests at the party also knew, which meant it would soon be spreading out into the wider wizarding community, tarnishing the family's reputation. Looking around the room Orion could see small groups of people talking quietly amongst themselves, occasionally shooting glances towards him and his wife. He felt a new wave of anger wash over him; it was time that his eldest son gained an appreciation of what it was to be a Black, and what the consequences were for not fulfilling that obligation.

"Nothing we can't deal with. You teach him at school, you must know that he can be a little headstrong at times," Orion explained.

Slughorn quickly jumped in to add his support, "Oh yes. His repeated refusals to join my little social group cause me great frustration. I do feel he would benefit from mixing with his own kind," here he added an ingratiating smile, "the very cream of wizarding society."

"Your group includes Lily Evans does it not?" Orion asked.

"Indeed, one of the brightest witches of her age, a true charms genius. I have no doubt that she will go far." He enthused.

"I fear we have very different views on 'the cream of wizarding society and of what makes someone worthy of my son's attention, so perhaps your views are better left unaired" Orion continued coldly, "In fact I must ask you to excuse me as the hour is growing late and I must discuss this matter with my son. My wife will remain downstairs to see off the guests, I'm sure she will have opportunity to offer the appropriate farewell pleasantries. You will be attending our annual Christmas party?" he asked.

"Yes of course, along with everyone who is anyone in our world!" Slughorn chuckled weakly.

"Then I will see you there, and wish you good health in the meantime," said Orion curtly, and with that final comment he turned on his heel and headed towards the main doors.

As he strode though the room groups of richly dressed witches and wizards moved to one side and house elves carrying trays now laden with empty glasses and plates scattered to allow his passage. However his progress was halted once more, this time by a tap on the shoulder. Frowning in irritation he turned round to find his wife waiting beside his. Her lips were clamped tightly closed and her skin was pale enough to seem transparent in places, her hands were clenched into fists hanging stiffly at her sides. Walburga Black was not happy.

"The Rosiers have just left." She snapped quietly, "they were not amused by that boy's display, if they reject this offer of an alliance," her voice, though still only loud enough for Orion to hear, had begun to verge on hysterical, "there's nobody else with a more suitable bloodline and good breeding, that's of course if anyone else will even contemplate a match with Sirius' behaviour as it is," her voice took on an even higher pitch, "I will not see this family polluted with half bloods or filthy mudbloods. Better dead than with a mudblood. Then Regulus could be the heir, Regulus always does what he is told."

"Calm yourself woman. I will deal with him." Orion commanded, and he strode off, continuing his route across the room towards the main doors.

This time he made it through with no interruption, on reaching the main doors he stepped through, leaving the glittering drawing room, lit by hundreds of candles enchanted to float around near the ceiling, for the relative gloom of the hallway. His footsteps echoed loudly as he made his way up the two flights of stairs, past the rows of silent portraits that looked on disdainfully. As he approached Sirius door Kreacher moved in behind him, the wretched thing had always disliked Sirius and would taken any excuse to see him get in trouble. Orion looked at the house elf in irritation and, with a slight grimace, kicked the creature away from the door. Using one hand to push the heavy wooden door he fastened the other tightly around his wand and marched into the room.

As Orion entered the room he saw his son, standing facing him, pale and still but otherwise showing no outward signs of emotion. A part of Orion, far removed from the smouldering rage, noted with pride his son's bearing and fortitude, however there was a time and a place for defiance.

Silence continued to reign in the room as Sirius stood face to face with his father, watching him as one would watch a tiger, waiting for the hammer of his fury to fall.

"Apologise." Orion demanded.

Sirius paused. This could be an escape, a way to avoid or at least reduce the punishment that was surely approaching. He started to form the words of apology, obedience to his father had been ingrained since birth, along with etiquette, family history and bigotry, but before he could speak his Gryffindor nature reared its head. He had been right to be angry; they were trying to dictate his life to suit their agenda, if he acquiesced now the next step would be an arranged marriage then he might as well be the perfect Black to keep them happy, turn in Remus for the 'dark creature' he was and torture Evans for being a filthy 'mudblood'. That was what his family would want after all.

"No." he said, holding his father's gaze

"Apologise," repeated Orion, giving him one more chance.

Sirius watched as his father's expression changed slowly from that icy emotionless calm to rage. His eyes became bright and sharp and Sirius could no longer hold his gaze. He dropped his eyes to the floor, noticing the way his father's robes just brushed the top of this soft leather boots and the way his hand was still gripped around his wand.

"So be it." Orion pronounced.

Sirius had caused him enough trouble over the past few years, he admired his son's spirit, but his resolute rejection of his own family values had moved beyond what was acceptable. If breaking his spirit was the only way ensure acceptable behaviour then that was what would have to be done. He raised his wand and took a step towards his son. He smiled cruelly as he saw the boy take a step back. Perhaps it would not be as difficult as he had imagined.

All of a sudden Sirius raised his own wand, "Expelliarmus!" he shouted.

Sirius was growing into a powerful wizard, and the force of his spell took Orion by surprise, however Orion Black had years of experience and training and, with a quick muttered incantation for a shield charm, the spell was deflected. Seizing the moment of Sirius' disappointment he issued his own disarming spell and watched in satisfaction as the boy's wand flew into his hand.

"Flipendo!" he cried, and a huge force issued from his wand and pushed Sirius across the room.

As he sailed across the open space Sirius saw the corner of the bed approaching. He braced himself for the pain, but was still left sprawled on his side gasping for breath where the hard wooden corner had knocked the air out of his lungs. He heard footsteps, and from his vantage point on the floor, could see those leather boots and embroidered hem heading towards him. Raising his head he saw that his father's wand was once again raised and pointing at him.

"Diffindo!" he heard his father cry.

A thin line of white hot pain shot across his arm and he saw a line of blood begin to soak through his sleeve. Black spots danced in front of his eyes as he struggled, still breathless, to stand up.

"Expelliarmus!" he heard again.

This time the curse threw his across the room and slammed him into the far wall. He heard a sickening crunch but could no longer tell one pain from another. He fell from the wall, cracking his head sharply against the cold hard floor and everything started to dim and fade to shades of grey. Struggling against the rolling waves of unconsciousness he rolled over onto his front and tried to crawl his way to cover.

"Sectumsempra."

He felt another burning slicing pain cutting across his back and felt hot liquid, blood he assumed, running down, soaking his robes.

"Father.. please…" he gasped.

"Are you ready to do as you are told?" Orion asked coldly, his rage seeming spent for the time being.

"It's… my life." Sirius managed to croak.

"Crucio."

Pain, the like of which Sirius had never felt coursed through his body. He felt as though every nerve ending was being pierced with tiny red hot needles simultaneously. He let out a scream, which he couldn't seem to stop. Orion held the spell for no more than a second, but when he released it Sirius collapsed into a ball on the floor, shaking slightly with his eyes closed.

"More?" Orion asked.

"Please Father.. no." Sirius begged, feeling a wave of self-loathing as he realised he could not force himself to deny his father again, could not take a repeat of that spell.

Orion sat down next to his son and stroked his hair gently and spoke in a soft voice, as one would use to comfort a very young child, "All you need to do is be the Sirius you used to be, act as you know you should. Then we never have to do this again. That would be best wouldn't it?"

Hating himself, eyes fixed firmly on the floor, Sirius nodded slightly.

"Episky." His father muttered.

Sirius shuddered slightly and sighed in relief as the gentle healing spell took away some of the pain. He lay there, still shaking from the lingering effects of the torture curse and the wounds and bruises he had suffered from slamming into the wall and furniture earlier.

"See how much better things are when you behave?" Orion asked gently, "Now I want you to think long and hard about your behaviour, and when I return we'll have another little conversation."

Sirius felt a sick feeling swelling in him stomach as he contemplated the prospect of another encounter like this. He watched as his father stood up, walked across the room and left, locking the door behind him, leaving Sirius alone and in pain, lying crumpled and bleeding on the floor, tears rolling gently down his cheeks.

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Author's note: I hope you enjoyed this. I found this chapter really difficult to write, as I'm very fortunate to have never suffered any kind of physical abuse. Any comments or constructive criticisms are welcome. Reviews keep me writing!


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